EE Mission Day 35 - Meeting Mila's Birthparents

When we arrived back in Mila Gayle's region to finalize her adoption paperwork, our facilitator mentioned to us that Mila's birth parents desired to meet us.  This was something that, although we had heard of and read about from other families, did not really expect to happen to us.  With that said, we told her we were open to meeting them.

When we had our first meeting with Mila ("known as "Gayle" then) back on 12/14/2011, some of  her life story was shared with us:

(1)  She was the second child of her birth parents; has an older sister.
(2)  When her parents heard of her DS diagnosis, she was brought to the orphanage, but her parents continued to visit her for the first year.
(3)  After the first year, when instructed of what Gayle's care needs were going to be, her parents decided to leave her there.  The visitations stopped.

Hearing this brief outline of a 3+ year story left us pondering some "why" questions:

• Why would they stop visiting her?  Was this some kind of rule linked to them giving up parental rights?
• Why would they now desire to see her and meet her adoptive parents?

Simple questions; yet I am certain the answers are far more complex.  It is easy to speculate answers, but the danger can include an ungodly judgement of people.  So, as I reviewed our prayer journal, this line item stood out:

That through the adoption journey, our witness to those "neighbors" we encounter advances (not hinders) the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Our facilitator confirmed that when we returned to the orphanage Friday, to sign some final documents and present the donation from Mila's bank account, that we would meet not only her parents, but her (maternal) grandparents...

So, Friday came; we drove over to the orphanage with Mila.  Our facilitator said that she could have lunch there; so as we were walking up to her OLD groupa room, there they were - her birth parents and grandparents...

To make a long story short, the meeting with them was a bittersweet blessing.  We could see the sadness in their faces as they provided us with gifts for her - some clothing, a baby doll, a snowsuit, and her gold Cross necklace from her Baptism. 

I noticed the sadness and shame in her mother's face as she explained to us (through our facilitator who translated) about how, in her country, they just do not know how to properly care for children like her.  Now, that is an easy comment to judge; yet, I am convinced that this is simply how this culture views "special needs" children.  Also, I do not think the good ole USA has it all together, either; with respect to the role of family and how to best disciple a child (notice I said disciple, not just teach).  You can agree or disagree with me on that comment...

Yet, we also experienced the comfort of knowing that they were very very happy that she had a new family that would be able to provide her the proper love and care.  They wanted to take pictures with us.  They asked if we would be willing to stay in touch with them, via Skype, regarding Mila's progress when she is home with us.  Remember the prayer journal line item mentioned earlier:

That through the adoption journey, our witness to those "neighbors" we encounter advances (not hinders) the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

We agreed to make contact once we get home and settled.  I pray and hope that doing so will be used by God to draw this family closer to the Lord...

As we prepared to depart, I remember seeing something that will stick with me for a while.  Mila's birth mother gave Mila one last hug and kiss, and then walked over to Stephanie and handed Mila to her, as if to say, "YOU are now her mother".  They offered us God's blessings, and then left.

We waited a couple minutes before leaving.  As we were entering the car with Mila, we could see her birth parents walking down the sidewalk together; not looking back.  I can only imagine what must have been going through their mind and heart...

Time will tell how this particular chapter to our adoption mission ends, but I do know for certain that, one way or another, God will be glorified!

Soli Deo Gloria!